Diamondhacks

Local Teams Win, Dbacks Whine

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 06:34:00 +0000

Despite half a decade of lobbying that the Phoenix market presents unusual competitive challenges for pro sports teams, it turns out that every local pro sports team is winning - except the organization crying itself to regular season sleep - the Arizona Diamondbacks.

The football Cardinals are 5-3 and appear poised for another exciting playoff appearance. The Suns have bounded from the stifling confines of this godforsaken midmarket to the NBA's very best record (7-1). Even the talent-poor Coyotes, mired in bankruptcy and management-inflicted woe, are 10-7, thanks to gritty defense and superb goaltending. In light of this nearly uniform success, would mentioning the Mercury's second WNBA title this October be considered piling on?

Everyone in this 'challenged' market is winning, except the doomsday Diamondbacks. More than a barrage of familiar excuses, however, separate success from the last place baseball team. Each winning franchise recently hired a respected coach who instantly improved team performance and culture -Ken Whisenhunt, Alvin Gentry and Dave Tippett. Contrast these intelligent, results-driven changes with the esoteric, politically motivated hire of AJ Hinch, whose floundering arrival divided and profoundly discouraged players, all but ensuring a season of collective failure.

Perhaps if Earl Kendrick managed his largely inherited baseball resources more astutely, another winner might emerge, against all odds, from this hardscrabble market of his well positioned imagination.

A Week At The Opera

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 17:00:00 +0000

I've been a baseball fan my whole life, but could hardly be less interested in this World Series. I flip to it every inning or two, get my snapshot, then change the channel to something less Wagnerian.

The Suns and Coyotes have both started well, and their early successes do more for me than the World Series I was brought up to revere. On Saturday, Oregon demolishing USC riveted me more than baseball's premier event. I'm not even much of a football fan.

What happened? Why dont I care? Does my relative disinterest portend trouble for the future of commerical baseball?

One issue is that I like an underdog, and this Series has none. We're watching a pair of favored bullies - the defending champions and the Yankees, whose starting infield oozes more market value than all but a handful of 25-man rosters. Who, outside of oblivious Yankee lifers, would be psyched by a thinly disguised All Star team bludgeoning its way to a long overdue title?

The principals are also numbingly familiar. No one can hit Rivera's cutter. Posada whines at strikes that are called such. Jeter sticks his ass into the next county on pitches anywhere near the inside corner, trying to coax a walk. Wake me after it stops. I'm not saying it's not good baseball - they're among the best players at their respective positions. It's just predictable, familiar and boring as hell. This "classic's" biggest novelty is that for the first time in his overchronicled playoff career, Alex Rodriguez hasnt completely soiled his diaper.

On Philadelphia's side, is it dramatic when Brad Lidge blows a save, or Jimmy Rollins steals a bag? Will it be surprising when Ryan Howard finally 'runs into one'? Chase Utley just hit his fifth homer, tying Reggie Jackson for most in a single Series, yet Jackson's performance electrified baseball, whereas Utley's heroics - in bandboxes in a homer era - barely register.

The FOX TV production is also deathly familiar. I actually like Buck and McCarver more than most fans seem to, but there's precious little new to attend to here. Tired storylines compete with almost painful media attempts to fabricate new ones. In a particularly myopic bit of "research", Countdown's Keith Olbermann knighted Damon's scamper to third, against the Teixeira shift, the "smartest play in World Series history". Smart play, but give it a rest, Keith. The pitcher forgot to cover third.

The games are consistently too long. It's okay to have a long game once in a while, for dramatic contrast. But all the games run three and a half hours now, even when they're well pitched. There's a hundred reasons; patient hitters, unrestricted trips to the mound, wildness, longer ad breaks between innings, small strike zone, pitching changes, etc. The once crisp cadence of the game now resembles cricket, a court case, or occasionally, a thirty years war.

Flipping channels between sporting events, I'm deflated at how little transpires during a World Series game these days. I can watch three crisp shifts of hockey or an eighty yard football drive in the time it takes Nick Swisher to eventually pop out or Jorge Posada to whisper signals to Sabathia before each pitch. It's very hard to watch this in real time, particularly when other sports and entertainments capture my imagination with new faces, and convey more respect for their audience, with less operatic pacing.

Conundrum

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 17:28:00 +0000

Here's a puzzler. See if you can figure it out.

The first time through a batting order, NL starters yield a cumulative OPS of .707. This is considerably lower (better) than they yield later in games, after they tire and batters have seen their repertoires.

First inning batters, by contrast, hit a whopping .771. We expect this, because a team's best hitters bat in the first. Given these two somewhat contradictory results, what would we expect OPS to be in the second and third innings?

If starters rip through the first 'round of nine' @ .707 , but first 'innings' are .771, might we expect second and third inning OPS well south of .700, to "counterbalance" big first innings?

Here's the conundrum. They're not. Batters' split in the second inning is .713, and in the third it rises to .727 - both higher than .707. How is this possible? How do these figures by inning reconcile with starters' superior proficiency first time through the order?

Break Up: The Dodgers

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 20:10:00 +0000

When most thirty year marriages end in court, the hilarity escapes me, but it's almost impossible to read up on the pending divorce of Dodger owners, Frank and Jamie McCourt, while maintaining a straight face. The AP account reports excess you'd expect from one of LA's most notable power couples:

Jamie McCourt's filing states she is seeking reinstatement as the team's CEO as well as access to perks including travel by private jet, stays at five-star resorts and use of the Dodgers owners' suite. She wants $321,000 a month in spousal support if reinstated to her former position. If not, she believes she should be paid nearly $488,000 per month.

Here's the LA lawyers, girding for battle:

There are estate records that list Frank McCourt as the team's sole owner, said Bert Fields, Jamie McCourt's attorney.However, the lawyer who drafted the documents alerted Jamie McCourt to the mistake last year in front of her husband who acknowledged the paperwork should have reflected the co-ownership of the Dodgers, Fields said.

"It was always supposed to 50-50," Fields said. "New documents were drafted, but they were never signed."

Frank McCourt's lawyer, Marshall Grossman, called the account a "fairy tale" and said the marital agreement lists the Dodgers and the adjoining property, including Dodger Stadium, as his client's separate assets and the couple's homes belonged to Jamie McCourt.

"This is the deal Mrs. McCourt wanted and got," Grossman said. "She now wants everything put back as community property. Even a chef knows you can't unscramble the eggs."

Wait, it gets better.

Frank McCourt:

...said he has allowed Jamie McCourt to identify herself as "co-owner" for the "interests of family harmony" but her claim has damaged the Dodger organization.

Wow. That's some family man. Once I offered my wife a club sandwich in the interests of family harmony, but never an actual club! This Frank is some sport.

Jamie McCourt

...claims her husband plotted to boot her from the team's front office as a way to "humiliate and ostracize" her. She said she was excluded from management decisions.

My impression is, if you're categorically "excluded from management decisions", you probably aint the CEO of much. Nevertheless, this is a formidable woman who sees herself as the engine behind Dodger success. From a 2007 issue of Jewish Woman:

Transforming the Dodgers into a family business is nothing new for McCourt. After 15 years with her own law practice, she spent a decade as vice president and general counsel of The McCourt Company, her husband’s real estate development firm. "We have completely different skill sets," she says of working successfully with her husband. "He’s the visionary and I’m the one who actualizes the vision."

This is what's hard to reconcile. If you're genuinely seen - within the organization - as an equal authority (ownership) figure and you've additionally established yourself as the hands on partner who 'actualizes the vision', how can you reasonably be "excluded from management decisions"? Practically speaking, how could that happen? It just doesnt sound to me like Jamie McCourt had much support or allegiance high up in the organization, and if that's true, she wasnt the CEO or co-anything, beyond ceremonial title.

Of potential interest to Dback fans, one of the McCourts' sons was installed as Dodgers' "Director of Marketing" a while back, although I couldnt pinpoint when. One would think this slot would've been right up Derrick Hall's alley, and I note Derrick left the Dodgers shortly after the McCourts arrived, as well as the fact the son has since left the post and returned to "business school". Interesting career path, to say the least, and one has to wonder if this nepotism hastened Hall's departure.

Favorite Slice

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 07:28:00 +0000

There's no shortage of ways to slice Diamondbacks' 2009 failure. Chronologically, there was April, June and September. Positionally, point your finger at left field, center and first base. Systematically, blame offense, defense or the pen. Strategically, lament GM moves topped by an unnecessary and disorienting managerial switch. Fatalistically, cry over Webby's shoulder and the 'bad luck' of being five games under pythag.

Bill James has a slice called Team Performance By Quality of Start, which may provide a crisper view of where, when and how our season went awry. His statistical cross reference breaks out a team's W/L by starter Game Scores - actually ranges or increments of game scores. It's no secret most clubs (incl Arizona) win at a very high rate when their starters pitch extremely well (70+ gs), and lose when starters are subpar (game scores below 50).

What's interesting is that the Dbacks had enormous difficulty winning when their starters were "above average" (50-69 game score). They were 35-35, which may not sound bad, but was the worst such split in the National League:

COL 58-21 .734
FLA 47-18 .723
LAD 56-24 .700

MILW 44-20 .687
PHI 41-22 .651
STL 46-25 .648
ATL 51-28 .645
SDG 42-24 .636
HOU 38-22 .633
SFO 43-26 .623

CHI 53-38 .582
NYM 40-29 .580
CIN 39-29 .573
WAS 36-32 .529
PIT 34-33 .507
ARI 35-35 .500

I've bolded NL West competitors to underscore just how far we lagged behind the division in this metric. Perhaps more curious than the striking chasms between Arizona and hard hitting, playoff bound Colorado and LA, are gaps between Arizona and most other weak hitting teams. Look at San Francisco. Despite a wretched offense, they excelled when starters were merely 'above average'. Remember, we're not looking at the best of the best (ie Lincecum's fourteen strongest starts, Sanchez no hitter, etc), simply 'above average', equivalently pitched (started) games.

Cincinnati also hit considerably worse than Arizona - yet they're ten games over .500 here. San Diego, Houston and the Mets all hit below league average, and were lousy teams - yet they average fifteen games over .500, when game scores meet the 50-69 parameter.

So, Arizona's problem was more than "hitting", at least in the traditional OPS+ sense. The James slice doesnt magically reveal what else contributed, but regular Diamondback observers might chime in with 'erratic bullpen', 'sloppy defense' and 'a rather glaring inability to execute small ball in close, well pitched games'. Less obvious factors, like random variaton or lack of competitive intangibles may factor in as well. For whatever combination of reasons, the Diamondbacks failed to consistently win in a favorable segment of games that comprised 43% of their schedule.

When Dback starters pitched lights out, the team did about as well (16-3) as expected. When starters struggled, the team did about as well, relative to league, maybe a little worse. However, when starters went six or seven innings, yielding two or three runs (above average), the Diamondbacks were terrible. Without confirming why, the slice statistically reinforces what many sensed all along - that the Dbacks' rotation, particularly the big three of Haren, Davis and Garland, received miserable "mid-range" support from the rest of their team, and that failure was broadly based.

**********

Here's some other favorite slices.

10. Banana Cream - dont puree the banana, leave it chunky
9. Pecan - the sweetest pah! Corn syrup and lots of it, Yum!
8. Peach Cobbler - cook the peaches down, almost mushy
7. Sweet Potato / Pumpkin - best dessert pie for breakfast, served cold
6. Razzleberry (Raspberry/Blackberry) - blackberries soften raspberries powerful tang
5. Lemon Meringue - best pie on a hot summer day
4. Apple - The Classic, hundreds of varieties. I'm partial to a crumb top
3. Blueberry - sweet, juicy with dense texture due to the small berries. An underrated pie.
2. Key Lime - graham crust, when done right, the most intense flavor of any fruit pie
1. Strawberry Rhubarb - Strawberry pie? Heaven forfend, you rube! Rhubarb elevates mere strawbs into an intriguing sweet and sour interplay of taste and texture. Served warm, with ginger ice cream.

Seen And Heard On Priest

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Sat, 17 Oct 2009 21:03:00 +0000

Last night I saw Strasburg, with a couple thousand ballfans over at Muni. My son wouldnt go. Not even the draw of a 100 mph flamethrower could assuage the lingering trauma from his last AFL outing. So I hopped the Phoenix High Speed Electrotrain to Priest, marched north past a couple corporate parks and encountered this.

You have to laugh. The AFL promotes an accessible product sans big league hassles, and the first thing you see is a ticket line bending to accomodate the curvature of the earth. They finally opened a second window, preempting unseasonable riots, and since all tix were general admission, the line actually moved pretty quickly.

My six dollar GA ticket afforded me a seat seven rows from the third base dugout, and for just $7 more - a barely cool plastic bottle of Coors Light. (I dont normally drink at games, but with the Electrotrain, anything goes! Besides, this is accessible baseball sans big league hassles! Bottoms up!)

Here's Strasburg:

He gets his body behind the ball, although not as extraordinarily well as Lincecum. I bring it up only because Strasburg throws so hard. Comes across his body a little. The first couple batters fouled off heaters, over their off field dugouts, as late as Little Leaguers. Soon however, hitters like Dback Brandon Allen, fouled both hard and soft pitches straight back (Allen walked). Strasburg went three and a third scoreless, and MLB's game report confirms the excellent results. Struck out just two, and induced several grounders including a double play.

Right now, MLB hitters would eat him up pretty good. Allen's ABs were instructive, in that he fought off a variety of offerings as if he was Ichiro, despite whiffing quite alot in the show. Most of these AFL kids were sitting on Strasburg's fastball and still couldnt do much with it, however. It's a helluva fastball. I just think major league hitters will time it, until he throws slower stuff for strikes.

Here's my last picture of Strasburg, just before two UFO's from right field abducted the prized righthander, whilst rendering my sophisticated camera equipment even more useless.

I took the electrotrain home. Well, the electrotrain and a bus. That's how it works, unless you live in the shadow of a McDonalds right on the line, or use the Park 'n' Rides, "conveniently" located closer to your destination than to your house. Waiting at the Priest / Washington station at night, a white pickup full of guys roared by, mockingly inquiring if anyone on the platform "needed a ride". We're up the road from ASU and the college hijinks made me smile.

As the pickup idled at a red light, a black man near me repeatedly challenged the offer, shouting from a respectable (ie non-threatening) distance, in the same sort of vein. The truck fell silent, until finally its lane's green arrow lit, the cue for its young passengers to lean out the windows, courageously shout "Nigger" and give us the finger as they sped off.

Unpleasant, but no one on the platform seemed too worked up about it. Forget Strasburg. The night's biggest regret is that my absent teen missed the manifest fear inherent in such racist bufoonery.

Jokers

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 20:30:00 +0000

As a rule, Diamondhacks avoids disparaging people's physical features. It's less a moral code than simply the daunting challenge of coming up with zingers sufficiently funny or cruel. We called Jeff Moorad fat once, which seems sporting since he's been fat for a long time. Plus, he can help being fat. If he occasionally refused butter and Baco-bits on all those ballroom potatoes, or walked his damn dog, there'd be no issue.

So, it's somewhat out of character that we run this. Anyway, my wife and I were watching a September game on TV , or trying to, when CEO Derrick Hall hijacked the telecast, reciting something about being "excited". As we understandably glazed over, my wife blurts out this bombshell:

That's the smallest mouth I've ever seen on a man.

Wow. She's right. All these years, pouncing on Derrick's illocution like a crazed raptor - and I never noticed. My obsession with what came out of his mouth blinded me from the real story. His mouth is incredibly small for a man. Or a marmoset, since we've broached the subject. This doesnt impede Mr Hall from yakking up the Dbacks, of course, but raises a question whether the Barnum pushing "All You Can Eat" has bitten off more than he can physically chew. A mini sirloin burger looks to be his match, or perhaps yogurt.

If you think that's 'going too far', contrast Hall's feeble kisser with AJ Hinch's outrageous wraparound. The ostensible skipper's frogyap extends well beyond where a healthy orifice ends, traveling half way 'round his smug Execu-Dome.

And when he opens that giant clamshell, a poor ump could lose his double chin faster than a rhubarb.

If there's ever a Batman sequel, where they need a Joker, who instead of terrorizing an American city, systematically destroys baseball fans' hopes in another, they know where to find him.

Red Convert

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 06:31:00 +0000

After years of strident resistance, I relented today and finally wore Sedona Red to the ballpark. I know what you're saying. "Matt, why?" "How could you?" and "Goddam traitor!" As awkward as it sounds, it felt comfortable - good even - I was at one with fellow fans.

The ballpark, of course, was University of Phoenix Stadium and vermillion was donned in support of our football Cardinals. This was my first NFL game in half a dozen years, although I'd witnessed a couple high school championships at this venue. You can find out about the game here. My impressions after the jump.

The celebratory 'jumper' (pictured) is CB Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie, who won the game with this last minute INT and TD return. We're not quite in the picture, but the first row gent in the white shirt was three butts to our left. So, we had fun-tastic seats, right on the rail of the infamous Red Zone. The atmosphere there was surprisingly mellow. People hooted and hollered, made noise when Houston was backed up in our end, yet I dont recall hearing a single profanity all day. It's different in the playoffs or when established teams visit, but that was a big surprise.

At one point, the cheerleaders were practically in our laps. Which was nice. Seriously, I could've petted one on the head repeatedly, if I was inclined, stroking her magnificent mane of auburn curls...the way she likes me to, before....well, you know, either before we got down to it, or before I channel Lenny from "Of Mice and Men." You decide.

Gosh, this place is comfortable. Thirty and forty years ago, I shivered through high school and college football games in Connecticut. Twenty years ago, my future wife endured her first date with me at the Cards' inaugural contest - a September scorcher against the Cowboys in 1988. God, it was hot. Subsequent games at Sun Devil Stadium were windy, rainy or uncomfortably warm. Today was 70'. No sunburn. No wind. The air never got stale, despite all those people and a closed roof. It was really nice.

The roof makes it loud. Louder than most baseball stadiums. The transluscent lid also lets in sufficient natural light, so you almost feel outside. Not quite, but almost. Airier and less gloomy than Chase, certainly.

Chase offers a wider variety of food and U of P prices ran about a buck higher per item. They roasted almonds and pecans, which were sublime, but I didnt see much else of interest. A brat, smothered in peppers and onions, and a decent sized Coke, ran me $10.50.

Got frisked and my ticket was examined at four separate checkpoints - not surprising given the NFL's self important, officious nature. Still, I was impressed with how friendly most employees were. Concession people acted like they really wanted your business. Ticket checkers smiled, while invariably instructing me to "Have a good time" or "Enjoy the game." A front office suit even struck up a conversation with me in one of the stairwells. There was just an air of good natured excitement and anticipation, that I cant honestly say I feel very often at Chase Field.

It's only one game, but Derrick Hall's crew has got nothing on these guys. I cant say which organization has the better all around staff, but one can assuredly ascertain which "enjoys" more undeserved hype. It's doubtful any staff could deliver on Hall's cheesy superlatives, and enthusiastic Cardinals staffers dont have to, paving the way for them to consistently exceed customer expectations.

Oh, they also hand you a free program when you walk in the door, there were no shrieking ad blitzes during the game, and the home team won a thriller. Fans hung on every play. Imagine that.

2009 Hackies

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 19:48:00 +0000

Most Outstanding Player: Dan Haren
Most Offensive Performance: Eric Byrnes
Most Glorified Coach: Kirk Gibson
Most Likely To Succeed: Justin Upton
Most Likely To Secede: Doug Davis
Best Dressed: Josh Byrnes
Best Performance By A Barely Engish Speaker in a Supporting Role: Trent Oeltjen
Oldest Human(under 30 division): (tie) Chad Tracy, Jon Garland
Hardest To Look At: Max Scherzer
Biggest Surprise: The Hinch hire

Biggest Enigma: Stephen Drew
Most Pleasant Surprise: Jon Rauch, Ryan Roberts

Most Underappreciated Season: Doug Davis
Fattest: Todd Walsh
Out in Left Field (muy loco): Senor Bobby Freeman

Most Ingratiating: Daron Sutton
Worst Haircut: Earl "Ken" Kendrick
Least Verbal: Radio mainstay Greg Schulte
Worst Hands: Justin Upton
Most Outstanding Defense: Coach Bryan Price
Oldest Human(open division): Joe Garagiola Sr
Best Second Half: Jon Garland
Worst Soil Borne Fungal Disease: Valley Fever
Best Vendor: Daryl
Best Rallyback: (no award)

Best Stadium Improvement: Daily Value Menu
Best Promotion(no wind) : Fireworks
Best Promoter (wind): Derrick Hall
Most Irreplaceable Team Blog: Dbacks Player Development by AJ Hinch
Smartest Player: Dan Haren
Most Durable: Mark Reynolds
Rookie of the Year: Gerardo Parra, Clay Zavada, Tor Kamata
Most Improved: Miguel Montero
Most Valuable: Dan Haren
Jean Hersholt Humanitarian Award: Derrick Hall

Lifetime Acheivement Award: Matt Williams...for instrumental contributions to The Game, encompassing broadcast, instruction amd playing the right way. Now, granted, that's easier said than done, but it all starts with character. These kids will learn that. They have the talent. They just need that second piece. What I have. Me and my ninth wife...

The Defense Never Rests

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 08:38:00 +0000

The historically explosive Suns' core established by Mike D'Antoni never got over the hump because of defense. More specifically, it was because their best, most irreplaceable stars (Nash, Stoudemire) werent consistent or inspired defenders, which exposed practical and morale cracks across the roster that inevitably widened come playoff time.

Most great basketball teams are led by a star who plays great D. Tim Duncan of the Spurs, Kobe /Shaq in LA, Jordan and Pippen with the Bulls - and going way back, the first Celtic dynasty, willed by the greatest defender of all, Bill Russell.

Can something similar be said of baseball? I'll leave history for another time. For now, let's just eyeball today's strong teams, quickly assess some stars, and bring it on back to our Dbacks.

The Yankees and BoSox may be special cases, because they're so laden with hitting and pitching talent. Perhaps defense isnt as critical to their success as with financially limited clubs. That said, big hitters Youk and Teixeira are considered good glovemen, albeit at first base.

In Philly, Jimmy Rollins has slipped, but is still the undisputed captain. He and Utley provide solid D up the middle. Pujols and clutch hitting Yadier Molina set the tone on the field in St Louis. The Dodgers' best hitter (Manny) is clearly a weak glove, but two way star Kemp mans center, augmented by Martin and Furcal/Hudson up the middle. Tulowitzki in Coors. Joe Mauer in Minnesota. Torii Hunter and Chone Figgins in Anaheim.

I'm not saying these are their respective teams best hitters or that they all have great defensive stats. I'm suggesting these are either team leaders and/or strong hitters who clearly set a team's tone on the defensive side.

Chris Young is a good defender. Stephen Drew is adequate at a demanding position. Neither is a consistent bat, nor sports the personality of a leader. Reynolds, Upton and Montero are not just breakout impact performers, but more fiery as well, and the issue I have is that they can all be characterized as rather sloppy defenders. Not bad empirically, so much - I realize Upton and Mark have good range. I'm talking about a reputation of fundamental preparedness that reinforces a teamwide expectation that defense is everyone's job - even if you're a good hitter.

Reynolds sets that tone when he dives into the stands, but still makes too many errors to be genuinely considered a defensive leader. JUp makes big plays with his wheels and arm, but his ineptitude at grounders or snagging a fly on a controlled dive, informs teammates that defensive fundamentals arent that important. Not if Justin's time isnt jeopardized by lackadaisical aspects of play. We led the NL in wild pitches with the lovable Montero behind the dish, and were 14th in nailing basestealers.

Hinch emphasized the need to improve team defense. I think one of these three impact hitters needs to evolve into a defensive "leader", and by that I mean someone who not only defends with intensity but who also limits defensive mistakes. A smart defender who thinks a step ahead and doesnt beat himself, and maybe even occasionally outsmarts the opposition with a trick play.

The logical candidate is Justin, because Reynolds' and Montero's shortcomings seem more entrenched. If Upton could turn himself into a reliable right fielder, it would not only save a few runs but might spark a shift in tone across the roster, about what's acceptable. Right now, you cant realistically sit JUp for muffing grounders, because he'd sit out too often to the detriment of the team. Much like the Suns could never effectively sit Steve Nash or Amare Stoudemire in any meaningful way.

This improvement needs to come from within, and is hardly outside Upton's grasp. Corner outfield is not a terribly demanding position. Not for a great athlete. You basically need to think, hustle and concentrate, and Justin's been getting by with his wheels, his arm and one or two of the other three on a good day. Upton needs to blossom defensively, much the way Conor Jackson did in 2008 - through off season preparation. It will do more than save the team a few runs. Inherent in such preparation is an attitude and committment, which teammates respect and ultimately emulate.

In two way sports like basketball or baseball, a team whose best players treat defense as a hobby or annoying little side project will consistently disappoint. When the most athletic stars exert the full extent of their professional will on the defensive side, teams tend to exceed expectations.

Scottish Mathematician Retroactively Proves 90 Win Season On The Nose!

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 17:27:00 +0000

While uneducated hordes of Arizonans decry what seemed a disasterous baseball campaign, Scotland's foremost Diamondback authority is not among them. After intent arithmetic postulation and thought deeper than your average abyss, it turns out his true Diamondbacks fought their way to ninety wins and an enormous misunderstanding.

Which, not coincidentally, coincides precisely with professor McLennan's suddenly prescient preseason prediction of - ninety wins!

If only others were as nimble of mind. Take me, for example. I foolishly predicted this team would win 85 times. This was wrong, because I failed to take into account several realities that came to pass. I overestimated the offense, I overestimated the defense and I overestimated the pitching. I was blind to the abysmal lack of depth and organizational disregard for competent managerial continuity. So, you can see how dumb I was, reality-wise.

Contrast my simple idiocy with the learned surety of a master projectionist utilizing advanced, perhaps futuristic, statistical principles. Professor McLennan deftly determined, for example, that all 2009 Diamondbacks "luck" was bad, and this carefully measured misfortune cost the club nineteen games. At this point, even someone like me can sum the club's ostensible 70 victories with this important nineteen figure to simultaneously arrive at truth and justice. I'm grateful such a rigorous sabermetrician would share his elegant proof with the rest of us.

Thank you, professor, for your brilliance and generosity - and congratulations to the true Arizona Diamondbacks, on their unappreciated season of success.

Hinch To Winners: Drop Dead

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 02:01:00 +0000

Today the Diamondbacks purged the only remaining men in their dugout with any successful managerial experience.

Chip Hale, Arizona's third base coach since 2007, had managed Dback affiliates six years prior, including three with Tucson's AAA Sidewinders, where he won the Pacific Coast League (PCL) Manager of the Year award.

Lorenzo Bundy, this year's first base coach, managed fifteen years in Mexico and the minor leagues - most recently with the Dodgers' AAA Las Vegas affiliate. He was twice named Manager of the Year in the Mexican League, and had worked with the Diamondbacks, on and off, for about five seasons. The Philadelphia native will have a tumor surgically removed tomorrow.

The dismissals were arranged by front office favorite Andrew Hinch, who supplanted Bob Melvin, the NL's 2007 Manager of the Year, in May. Hinch's voice cracked as he explained his staff's need for "new voices" in 2010.

In his first coaching assignment at any level, and bouyed by breakout seasons from Justin Upton, Mark Reynolds, Miguel Montero and Dan Haren, the deeply sensitive skipper propelled Arizona to a 58-75 mark (.436), good for last place in the National League West.

This Week's Hacks

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Sun, 04 Oct 2009 02:46:00 +0000

Though most of Wrigley's weekend allotment of oxygen was consumed and expelled by motormouth as of Friday afternoon, at least seething Snake fans could flip to WGN's Len Kasper and Bob Brenly for welcome fresh air. They talk. They shut up. You can hear game sounds, the fans! They talk some more. Then shut up again. It's like two intelligent people, thinking in real time before they impose on listeners.

Between pauses, Brenly offered how Hinch's hire upended Arizona's clubhouse. Bob all but nominated Chip Hale post facto; the main point being Hale nurtured our core on a daily basis in Tucson. Brenly also ripped into Cubs' first inning preparedness, charging Pinella's team hasnt looked ready to play all week, and volunteered several players are already cleaning out their lockers.

Daron or Grace will rattle on for innings to do Derrick Hall's bidding, whereas Brenly makes incisive, equal opportunity critiques in thirty seconds or less. He and Kasper respect that the game always trumps personal ego or an owner's agenda.

Dbackers didnt see much of bats this year, but we plan to see plenty of bats tonight.

ASU football lost to Oregon State's Beavers, in Tempe, for the first time since 1969. USA Today ranks Peoria's undefeated Centennial High, sixth nationally. That might be a decent matchup.

The barely solvent NHL Coyotes solved the Kings just fine at Staples Center, ruining LA's home opener 6-3. Spirited forechecking and a sense of urgency are evident under the new coach. What a great story if the 'Yotes rose from near extinction to inspire the Valley. Even if Todd Walsh has to tell it:

"Godspeed, Coyotes. Godspeed."

Out of Town Scoreboards

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 20:53:00 +0000

This time of year, normal Phoenicians have long since tired of what the usual opinionistas profess did in our local nine. Derrick Hall looks to injury and happenstance, Levski targets the EB contract, and my dear friend Jim McLennan blames Colangelo, stupid fans or anyone other than Jim's put upon franchise princelings. This blog, Diamondhacks, ID's pretenders undermining not just our NL West chances, but Western civilization itself.

So there you have it. We know where everyone stands. Or bends. Let's fill our lungs, instead, with some fresh air from beyond our well dug trenches. From Andrew Baggerly, for example, an SF Giants beat writer. Keep in mind, "beats" normally come down more critically on the orgs they cover every single day. Three days v. the Dbacks apparently made quite an impression.

Baggerly:

The Arizona Diamondbacks are a hot mess. I used the word “dysfunctional” in my game story, but only because I write for a family newspaper.

The players don’t appear to hustle or care, they make embarrassing fundamental errors and almost every inning, you get the sense they’ve never scouted their opponent or pay any attention to detail. I suppose that’s what happens when you replace your manager with your farm director in the name of “organizational advocacy.” (And while I don’t know much about A.J. Hinch, it’s pretty clear a Stanford degree only gets you so far.)

Let’s put it this way. If a runner is standing at third base with less than two outs, the game situation often compels you to play the infield in, right?

When that runner is Bengie Molina, uhhhh… not such a smart move.

The most embarrassing part was when pitching coach Mel Stottlemyre Jr. went out to talk to Dan Haren, got snippy when plate umpire Hunter Wendelstedt tried to move things along, and ended up getting tossed. Then Hinch got tossed, too.

All the while, Haren was standing on the mound, getting cold. Brilliant stuff, boys.

Another out of towner, Spink Award winner Tracy Ringolsby, rumors the reeling Dbacks are for sale. One can certainly pray. His unsourced tidbit drew a blustery denial from Earl "Ken" Kendrick, the moralist legally squabbling over Jeff Moorad's outgoing share, while preaching he's not in baseball for the money.

Kendrick:

"It's a complete and total fabrication of the highest order. That's [selling the Dbacks] the last thing on my mind."

Well, hardly the last thing, given recent sale of another major league franchise all but confirmed "the last thing" on Kendrick's mind was his most embedded partner's vigorous interest in the San Diego Padres.

Ringolsby points out "there is no indication that there have been any serious talks with a prospective buyer...", so he's not floating a baseless rumor that a sale is imminent. He's implying a credible, unnamed source has hinted to him that the Dbacks are "available", open to discussion, etc. Kendrick calls that a complete and total fabrication? It's not much of a story, is it? The idea Kendrick would sit down with a hypothetical buyer? Why would Ringolsby completely fabricate something so mundane out of thin air?

It's true he shares my general disdain for Dbacks brass, and more specificially their hollow cult of organizational aggrandizement, but as a columnist, he's entitled that. The issue isnt who likes who - it's whether there's anything to the sale rumor and who's telling the truth.

We dont know the answer, but I would ask two questions pursuant to it.

1. Who sounds more credible, less bombastic here? A high ranking journalist who claims the Dbacks are "available" but there's no evidence of any serious sit downs, or an owner who dismisses such tame talk as "a complete and total fabrication." How could Kendrick possibly know what others have confided in Ringolsby to make such a sweeping indictment?

2. Who's got the larger potential conflict of interest? A very well-connected journalist relaying an unsourced aside, or the owner of an unstable $400M concern, worried about his position amid rumor he wants out? Who has more to gain by hiding the truth for their own profit?

Perhaps Jeff Moorad could shed some light on the subject.

No Visible Means of Support

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 04:43:00 +0000

Clinching last place in the NL West would normally warrant the headline, but a curious incident in today's third inning at China Basin supercedes everything else.

With one out in the third inning, and runners on first and third, Justin Upton got drilled on the lower forearm, just above the wrist, by a Brad Penny 94 MPH fastball. Home plate umpire Brian Knight motioned Upton to take his base, as the Giant battery appealed the check swing.

First base ump Wendelstedt ruled Upton went around and called the pitch a strike. Check swings are notoriously nebulous, especially from a head on, or center field camera. Often, what doesnt look like much of a cut, when reviewed from the appropriate side angle, is revealed to be an extended arc through the strike zone.

This wasnt one of those times.

The side reply confirmed Upton barely got the bat off his shoulder and the lumber never got near the strike zone, let alone passed through it. It was just a pathetic call, probably the second worst of the year, after Jerry Crawford's brain fart against Washington, where our runner was safe by ten feet.

Upton disagreed but his lack of animation can be attributed to either composure beyond his years or the fact he was in a state of shock. Hinch came out briefly, not to argue but to get up to speed apparently, and promptly walked back. That's it. No discussion with Wendelstedt. Nothing.

Maybe AJ didnt see it. Maybe he was distracted on the play. I can understand that and want to give him the benefit of the doubt.

But here's what I dont get. Upton's a right handed batter. The visitor's dugout in San Francisco is on the first base side. Due to the lack of tradional bullpens at this venue, plus September callups, there were at least 30 players and coaches in the Diamondbacks dugout when this happened. Presumably most of them, aside from Chris Young, enjoy adequate eyesight and had an unobstructed view of Upton's non-swing.

Were they not watching the game either? Do they not care enough to relay this information to Hinch? Did they try to, but it didnt get through for some reason? I'm just dumbfounded by Hinch's non reaction to Wendelstedt's boner. First, it may've taken the Dbacks out of a big inning. Second, and more importantly at this stage of the season, your 22 year old superstar just got metaphorically chopped and screwed, and it appears nobody had this kid's back when he clearly deserved it.

When the scoreless inning turned over, Upton approached Wendelstedt on Justin's way to right field. The All Star looked more disappointed and hurt than angry. As the crusty umpire alibied, the youngster could barely meet Wendelstedt's gaze, like an honorable son who cant look an alcoholic father in the eye.

It's been a tough season. There's been plenty to be embarrassed about. But watching Upton twice fight this obvious battle alone, then visibly simmer from his post in right field, I'm not sure I've ever been as embarrassed to be a Diamondback fan.

Sutton Speaks!

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:24:00 +0000

For those who dont get enough of Daron Sutton, Jim from AZ Snakepit dutifully taped a lengthy interview with the Dbacks' televangelist. Jim is such a dear friend and admired colleague of Diamondhacks, I've decided to share my thoughts on the interview somewhere other than at Jim's website, for fear of reprisals.

Actually, it's a good interview, in that Daron elaborates quite a bit, even when he's full of crap, which isnt too terribly often. I suggest you read it, otherwise my critique will make even less sense than usual.

*************

Daron says he aims to talk to "all the fans". I appreciate the pressing commercial need to target and engage so-called casual viewers, but the twitterish urgency with which FSNAZ steers away from games, often leaves baseball fans cold. Switching to silly or off-topic or feature mode in a blowout is one thing, but FSNAZ effectively abandons games that are 3-0 or 4-1 in the fifth, as if such games couldnt possibly entertain people.

By "returning" to games only if the Dbacks rally, Daron and crew condition viewers to suddenly react to results, without truly internalizing baseball's ebb and flow, the frequent failure inherent in the game, or the underlying perserverance instrumental to success. This is exactly what Derrick Hall complains about with fans, that they dont understand the game's travails, yet the irony is Hall's aggressive insistence to position his team in a superficially favorable light, contributes to (some might even say "drives") this very lack of fan understanding, perserverance and soul.

Neither is Sutton focused on baseball fans when he gushingly indulges Todd Walsh's smirking portfolio of off topic, cryptic asides. Walsh is about my age and we have similar tastes in music, but his rambling concert remembrances are utterly out of place in a baseball broadcast. Unless it's all about amusement, and not baseball, in which case I vote for less Daron and Todd, and more optical illusions and porn.

I liked how Daron volunteered young players are trying to re-establish the integrity of the sport. There's no glib assumption that the games he calls are clean, and I think that's refreshingly honest and accurate.

Regarding attendance, Sutton disparages Arizona as a 'baby fan base' that needs time, perhaps a generation, to establish itself.

Daron: I came from a place in Milwaukee where they're drawing three million fans...

Milwaukee never drew anywhere near 3M when Daron was there, and they're not drawing 3M today because they're suddenly a better, or older, fan base than Phoenix. They're drawing 3M now because they finally got rid of Daron and Derrick's beloved mentors ( the Seligs, who whined their small market, revenue-sharing way to four winning seasons in twenty lucrative years) in favor of a young, dynamic owner with customer driven priorities. Attanasio's already improved on field performance and star appeal, and less famously restructured value propositions at Miller Park when he arrived (2005). After Selig, many Milwaukeans sensed they were getting in on something better and within a couple years, bought in. Attendance has soared, in what the Seligs invariably portrayed as a disadvantaged small market.

Much the opposite in Phoenix, where Kendrick and Moorad carpetbagged a popular franchise founder, and assumed good will magically transferred to them with title. On the volatile heels of 2004, they astonishingly jacked single game prices in 2005, and again in 2006 - and raised some season rates as well. That, combined with an early litany of crass public relations missteps and baseball ops errors, suppress attendance to this day. So, Daron, forgive me as I suppress a snicker, listening to you educate Phoenicians about our not ready for prime time 'baby fan base' - when we toddlers averaged 3M fans (2.95) over seven consecutive years before you even got here.

My daughters go to school with what will be the real Diamondbacks' fans.

Again. Blech. Sounds like a Jim McLennan or Derrick Hall talking point. Can anyone imagine Colangelo saying that? Can these jokers possibly dream up more excuses to distract from their self-inflicted disconnect with this market? Gee, maybe Arizona's too hot to draw fans. Or we're too close to California. The upper deck's too big and doesnt convey the right atmosphere. The fans arent educated enough and dont understand 'the realities of baseball'. Dont laugh - they've actually floated the last two with a vengeance.

Attendance stinks, ultimately, because ownership stinks - at least in the eyes of fans. Just like it used to be in Milwaukee. Fans dont have confidence in owners or franchise direction, or derive sufficient values at the park. In Phoenix, a dozen years of hard and soft data, across winning and losing seasons under both regimes, reflect stark distinctions in public opinion about comparative owners.

In other news, Sut thinks the Dbacks need a veteran presence, perhaps two - one for the bench and one in the pen. Coming from an insider with some pulse for the clubhouse, I think it's troubling that's the first "need" Daron blurted out, and may suggest the players enjoy less credible leadership than is generally let on.

Gracie's brash insights seem more along the lines of the drunken uncle at Thanksgiving who rails about the government. The government is, in all likelihood, too big, but you're apt to hear a more elegant case made at the local transmission shop. When Grace talks defense, however, I'm all ears. He knows a thing or two about that. Despite good team range, the Diamondbacks defense visibly broke, contrary to volatile metrics contriving Stephen Drew and Montero saved more runs than Tulowitzki and Yadier Molina. As Grace might say, with the Diamondbacks last in the league in double plays, and first in 'wild pitches', how the f*ck can you take that $&!+% seriously?

Homestands Mercifully End

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Sun, 27 Sep 2009 20:40:00 +0000

Congratulations to the Diamondbacks, who stole their second September series -in only eight tries - both over the powerful Padres. Stolen by a fan, who interfered with skywalking San Diego CF Tony Gwynn Jr, by reaching over the fence for a Chad Tracy pool shot. Stolen by HP umpire Tim Timmons in the eighth, who gifted Esmerling Vazquez two called strikes after the wild righty went 3-0 on leadoff speedster Luis Durango. Assuming Gwynn makes the grab (and it appears he might on the tape), fan and umpire cost San Diego a minimum of four runs in the game.

But as Mark Reynolds might say, "So what?" The meaningless victory was made moreso by the fact it was primarily driven by veterans expected to flee in the fall; Tracy and Ojeda, who compiled no less than half the teams hits, runs and rbi's between them. That said, Billy Buckner worked seven, and with a September ERA under four, has solidified his standing in next spring's wide open rotation.

Speaking of Augie, for some time, one lower deck fan in particular bellows "Augie, Augie, Augie...Oy, oy, oy" as the diminutive crowd favorite approaches the plate. He's so loud you can often hear him on telecasts. Anyway, today Sutton divulges this superfan is, get this, actually one of the team's owners. Not a General Partner, but this iron lunged galoot, Jim Weber, holds a significant financial stake in the team.

I suppose one could look at this a couple ways. It's cool having an owner passionate enough to come to games and scream and shout. On the other hand, when arguably the most vocal fan in your entire base is one of the owners, it's pretty goddam embarrassing.

Derrick Hall parked himself in the booth in the season's final home game. You already know what I think of these "guest appearances", so I'll relay my wife's take instead. She's a casual fan, with no axe to grind, who just likes to see the team win. She shook her head and concluded:

How pathetic. That guy has an excuse for everything.

What's funny is, Hall toned down his standard onslaught, presumably in response to the recent groundswell of unprecedented online criticism. But fan patience and perceptions have deteriorated sufficiently to outstrip his modest rhetorical concessions. Amid a local depression, he's still preaching affordability of season tickets to families, claiming the best 'stadium experience' in the land, etc. It's awkward and sad. If it werent for the 2011 All Star Game, I'd almost think Hall is ready to jump ship. He sounds that desperate. The deeply disappointing W/L record, which Hall first laid at the feet of Bob Melvin, then "injuries" after the AJ Hinch non-turnaround, was once again today blamed on "a really poor start", begging the question of how reasonable people are supposed to weigh this miserable season's middle and end.

Justin Upton reached three times today and let a slow grounder get under his mitt in right, that advanced two runners a total of four bases. Jesus Christ, Superstar!

Finally, kidcaster. I'm down with it, provided kids are respected and have a chance to announce the game. Unfortunately, it's devolved into awkward "interviews" of frightened kids patronized by middle-aged TV stars. Daron's passable, but Grace sounds as if he's never talked to a kid, off camera, in his life, and takes on a particularly creepy persona around girls between 8 and 35. Or as he might say, "females".

"I bet your brother picks on you?"

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

Much like the Diamondbacks first 155 games, I'm not enthusiastic about this segment.

The Show Must Go On

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 20:34:00 +0000

A fantastic weekend is in full swing and the town is abuzz. Tonight Miley Cirus gets serious at jobing.com arena, and the Patrick Swayze film festival muscles into the Valley Art. Fellas wont want to miss Sunday's high rise implosion over at Third and Earll. It'd be a crime to let a few freeway closures deprive you of all this town has to offer.

Speaking of crime (and implosions), the Diamondbacks' exercise their sense of humor this weekend, hosting "Fandemonium", Latin for "You're still here? Seriously?" The club's canned, slutty come-on, to mostly absentee season ticket holders, occurs in the middle of Padre exhibitions, emphatically confirming last place in the NL West.

So What?

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 23:36:00 +0000

When confronted by a reporter about his record setting 205th strikeout, Mark Reynolds cheekily replied "So what?" Before taking sides in the ensuing kerfuffle, perhaps we should decipher what "So what?" really signifies. To me, it connotes two things:

1. The subject in question doesnt matter
2. I dont want to talk about it. No comment.

I've got no problem with 2. Reynolds is more accessible than most. He's been asked about strikeouts his whole career, and just set a highly dubious record. He doesnt want to talk about it right then. Some people think talking on demand is his professional responsibility. I dont.

Problem is, he didnt say "No comment". He said "So what?", which incorporates the combative and easily misunderstood #1. I'm not here to bash Reynolds. It's clear he doesnt even believe #1, and said so the next day, explaining how whiffs can bog down an offense and kill rallies. He's honest, and just had a bad day.

Which is more than one can say for Diamondback broadcasters. For the last two ballgames, Grace and Sutton have been feverishly trying to persuade viewers that Mark Reynolds' strikeouts "dont matter". The campaign started in the fourth inning Tuesday, when the booth made the stunning editorial call to not mention Mark's record-setting whiff. A couple innings later, an uncharacteristically blase Daron divulged the information, as if passing along an uninteresting bit of trivia.

Damage control hit full gear Wednesday. Todd Walsh propped Mark up as a hero - or martyr - for uttering "So what?", as if those courageous words gave rise to some nascent political movement.

-- No justice. No peace.

-- Hell no. We wont go.

...and now -- So what?

Walsh actually chided the offending mikeman with the gall to inquire about the all time strikeout record. As if such a thing mattered, when Walsh had Poco tickets to disburse. Imagine the nerve!

Daron and Mark came armed with a boatload of stats to convince Arizona there's nothing to see here. They spoke of Mark's positive production, which is fine, to a point. Look, I'm firmly in the camp that Reynolds is having an excellent season, and dont think his strikeouts are all that big a deal, given some of this organization's more pressing problems. But Sutton and Grace sounded more the rehearsed, unrebutted sermon (a la FOX/MSNBC, take your pick) than a genuine debate of ideas. It went on, in a very purposeful, one-sided way, for several innings.

We get that many players make more outs than Mark, and his GIDP is relatively low (his 8 is third highest on the team but low to medium around the league). We also understand he limits opportunities to advance runners and reach on batted ball errors. We get that Mickey Mantle struck out a ton, but understand that Mark has more in common with Russell Branyan and Dave Kingman than with Mickey Mantle - despite Grace's dismissal of Kong. There are currently nineteen NL position players with more Win Shares than Mark. That's a very good player, no doubt, yet falls shy of blanket forgiveness of his failings on the false grounds he's one of the game's transcendant greats.

Insisting his strikeouts dont matter is akin to assuming Nolan Ryan's walks didnt matter either. Ryan's uncompromising tradeoff kept his true value from approaching the mythic heights of his reputation. I admire Reynolds, for many reasons, but his incomparable whiffs limit him in similar ways, and to some extent, define him. To deny that, or to say over and over that only Mark's accomplishments "matter", is the latest in a long line of purposeful condescensions to Diamondback fans.

We're thrilled with the homers, the grit and improved defense. But that doesnt make Mark's shortcomings magically disappear. Or this team's failings, for that matter. Any day now, when The Kid crunches #44 for a last place team, flanked by a lineup of losers in another meaningless game, we could just as easily ask, "So what?"

Understanding San Francisco

noreply@blogger.com (jamaal) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 01:55:00 +0000

Jamaal here. Consistent with man's nature, baseball's western nationals measure themselves against the first place Dodjers, and Matt recently noted how the Diamondbacks shall finish below San Diego, but as Gay Area Giants prance into my adopted village, I am perplexed by a more ungodly standing.

How is it my glorious cobras slithered fifteen games beneath San Francisco's unholy, throbbing rear? No disrespect intended to Lincecum, Cain or the West's great sodomy capital, but San Francisco's just not very virtuous! Barry Zito rotates third, for the love of Allah, and the lineup resembles a bedeviled Falstaff and The Seven Dwarves. How could my team, sporting stoic heroes like Garland and Drew, flag so badly?

For one thing, Sugar Cain is sweeter than we Arizonans generally perceive. His 5.16 ERA vs the Diamondbacks is easily his worst slice of the candy. Zito the deceptive Italian, is not quite pasta his prime. [joke] Did you know Zito's gang from 'Queer 39' is 17-14 in his starts? Merely one notch shy of hirsute Dan Haren (18-13)? For comparison, Arizona plays a paltry 12-20 behind our sinister south hand, Doug Davis.

Besides sodomy and frivilous pursuits, San Franciscans engage in more sacrifice flies and hits than do their austere desert counterparts. Bengie Molina, another Italian, retires base stealers slightly better than countryman Montero - the weakest armed Tuscan Musketeer. Yet all this doesnt explain the vast chasm between the two sides.

I noticed on b-ref.com an alarming disparity in "Defensive Efficiency". Giants second? Vipers 14th? Surely that signifies performance issues among men. A similar gulf between the American "bull-pens", as Bochy's bowlers retire batsmen with frequency, whereas Hinch's hurlers do not.

Perhaps our local nine's bent standing, facing up at San Fran derrieres, is not so perplexing, after all.

If a bat falls in a forest...

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 05:44:00 +0000

While Mark Reynolds ran rings around history with his forest of strikeouts, tonight's FSN gamecast branched off to a most curious question:

If Mark whiffs and no one hears it, does it make a sound?

In the fourth inning, Reynolds logged the all time seasonal strikeout record (205) and, amazingly, Daron Sutton and Mark Grace didnt utter a peep. They knew he did it, but not a word.

I understand the batter's K mark isnt as noteworthy as the seasonal home run record or the pitcher's strikeout mark, for that matter. I understand Mark's having a terrific season and doesnt want to be 'defined' by strikeouts. I understand this is a strikeout era and his record may be broken soon enough by someone else. I understand many of history's greatest hitters struck out a great deal, and an increasingly popular school of thought suggests K's are no worse than any other outs.

I even understand that Daron and Mark are company employees and not real journalists.

I get all that.

But regardless of how Reynolds wants to be defined or should be defined, this century old sport remains defined, at least in part, by numbers and records. It's the coin of the realm. The frame of reference - and Mark Reynolds just broke one of the frame joists.

Even if there arent real journalists in the booth, the pretense of honoring baseball - especially in Phoenix - lingers heavy in the air. We expect, and deserve, to hear the facts on the field, if not in the clubhouse or front office. This clowning production spends almost half an inning on Todd Walsh fake schmoozing Danny Zelisko for tickets to a fucking Poco concert, then decrees the All-Time seasonal strikeout record isnt worth a mention in real time?

Yesterday, we documented how Sutton steers attention to the game when things go the Dbacks way, and diverts attention when things turn sour. The Game, in its merciless spontaneity, represents Truth, and the organization has fled from that unpleasantry, in favor of overchoreographed, manipulative artiface.

Did you hear Mark Reynolds strike out? Didnt think so.

Never happened. Nothing to see here.

Poco tickets still available.

See No Evil

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 05:35:00 +0000

Barely two years after ceasing to be a viable ballplayer, Eric Byrnes' eponymous TV show is suddenly going off the air. I dont know about anyone else, but now that I cant watch Byrnsie mumbling with his hat on backwards, sippin' a Starbucks, I'm not sure what to do with my time.

In related news, four months after being a viable major league team, the Diamondbacks arent on TV much either. The past few Saturdays have been radio games, granting visual respite from AJ Hinch's AAA rebuilding exercise and the oily accompaniment of Daron Sutton and Todd Walsh.

The game's not on TV tonight either. Instead, FSN is blasting Frank Caliendo's loud and uneven impressions, another tape of Joe Garagiola's ceremony that dominated Sunday's broadcast, Redheads pre-sell coverage, a never ending Todd Walsh indulgence with ticket broker Danny Zelisko, extended japery between Gracie and....wait a second. Is that Barry Zito? Oh, gosh. My mistake. There is a game being televised tonight. Sort of. Oh, and the game's tied in the seventh. Who knew?

Attendance @ The Lovely Morgan has dropped almost 5000 fans per evening since last year, one of the largest % and numerical drops in the sport, yet curiously the Dbacks' National League ranking remains eleventh (out of sixteen teams) - same as 2008.

Even with light rail and a summer of Phoenicians curtailing out of town vacation travel , this will be the fifth year in a row our team draws more on the road than at home, despite Chase Field's purported "lowest prices in baseball." Colangelo never made such claims, or massaged pricepoints to look better in industry TMR metrics. He just offered higher quality baseball at broadly lower prices, and drew more fans downtown than they did on the road - every single one of his seven years at the helm.

10:30pm -- The Dbackles just dropped tonight's 'contest' to the Giants. The loss puts Arizona four games south of San Diego, with eleven to go. After the game, AJ Hinch called it a night of poor execution and not winning baseball. More accurately, it's been a season of poor execution, with players acquired by JByrnes, developed and managed by Hinch.

Bob Melvin won 90 games and went to the 2007 NLCS with Doug Davis and Livan Hernandez as his #2 and 3, and a bunch of rookies and journeymen in the field. He got fired, presumably, for finishing two games off the pace in 2008, and falling 4.5 back of the wildcard in May of this year. Derrick Hall termed this five months 'gross underperformance'.

In his five months, AJ Hinch has rocketed out of contention faster and farther than anyone imagined, far worse than Melvin ever did with this rough core of players. As the brass defends AJ's hire under these circumstances, making excuses for AJ when they made mincemeat of Melvin, one can hardly escape what unprincipled phonies run our newly entrenched, last place Arizona Diamondbacks.

I. Hope. He. Fails

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 22:23:00 +0000

We rarely dip into politics, being the tasteful, retiring blog we are, but something ugly forced our hand. If you were to poll my neighbors, seems our young Afro-American standard bearer, a renaissance man, is too into hisself. Hasnt delivered on all dem lofty promises. A fat blowhard went sofarazta sneer, "I. Hope. He. Fails." Now, Phoenix dont want him influencin' our childrun on tellervizun. Too much hero wushup, an awl.

Needless to say, my Phonetic neighbors speak of rightfielder Justin Upton. You hear it on local message boards, and not always thinly veiled. About how the 22 year old doesnt play 'smart' or exhibit sufficient 'humility'. Despite the fact he's already baseball's third best rightfielder (Ethier, Suzuki), a vocal element insists he'd benefit from a train ticket (upper berth, presumably) to Reno for "seasoning", where some white coach can whip him into shape.

To be fair, it hasnt all been about race. For some time, most fans didnt understand how good Upton was for his age. It wasnt their job to care, particularly, and they wanted to see good players now, regardless of age or color. And there's that ongoing "fielding" of Justin's. Statistically, quite good, because of the range and cannon, but frankly, enduring JUp muff grounder after grounder transcends issues of race. The glove's a pet peeve of mine, but that's all it is. Before too long, maybe he'll invest in a mitt smaller and more flexible than a jai alai cesta. He does too many things, too well, to get all bent out of shape about it, let alone suggest demoting him to the minors.

Diamondhacks sez: "Keep doing your thing, young black fellow. Dont let The Man in Phoenix get you down. The Man on talk radio. The Man in the forums. The Man in section 118. Just keep your eye on the ball, a bit moreso on defense."

Change we can believe in.

Rebuilding Illusions

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 03:39:00 +0000

Q: Is every year a rebuilding year?

Derrick Hall: I would not categorize this as a rebuilding year... It is not a rebuild when you have a core of Justin Upton, Mark Reynolds, Stephen Drew, Brandon Allen, Miguel Montero, Chris Snyder, Chris Young, Gerardo Parra, Dan Haren, Conor Jackson, Max Scherzer, Ryan Roberts, Juan Gutierrez, Esmerling Vasquez, Dan Schlereth and Chad Qualls in place, to name a few....

To name a few? Heh. See what Hall's up to? In response to a generic rebuilding question, he's done two very clever things.

First, he's taken the traditional concept of "core" (ie typically young impact players an organization builds around) and devalued it to little more than an expanded laundry list of possible 2010 contributors. Since when is 29 year old journeyman Ryan Roberts a franchise cornerstone? In what successful 2009-10 core does Dan Schlereth (and his 8.76 ERA) comfortably reside? What vital contributions can we bank on from Brandon Allen, Chris Snyder, Conor Jackson, Chris Young and the host of young or injured relievers? Hall's elevated all these looming 2010 uncertainties to "core" status, presumably to drum up excitement and overstate his actual hand.

Second, he's not only tied this forward-looking potential to roster stability next year, but very specifically tries to pawn it off as evidence the organization didnt rebuild "this year" either. Rebuilding connotes two impressions that accurately capture Arizona's 2009 season, yet which Hall desperately wants to avoid; instability and losing.

Despite this mis-direction, and Jim McLennan's Oscar-worthy efforts (Best Supporting Role in A Comedy), there's no denying the 2009 Diamondbacks reconstituted a big chunk of their roster, both in contrast to 2008, as well as during the 2009 season. They endured a new skipper and pitching coach in May. Of nine Opening Day starters, only two (Drew, Young) regularly start today. (Ok, stalwarts Upton and Reynolds didnt start the opener, but Chris Young hasnt been the continuous embodiment of stability either.)

Four of Hall's alleged core guys werent even on the 2009 opening day roster, and the pitching staff has new names and unfamiliar roles aplenty: Scherzer, Buckner, Zavada, Vasquez, Boyer. In addition, Garland and Rauch, acquired within the past fourteen months, have departed in favor of even newer faces.

Here's a list of 2008 starters and impact contributors who had lesser or non-existent roles in 2009:

Brandon Webb
Randy Johnson
Micah Owings
Brandon Lyon
Tony Pena
Juan Cruz
Chris Snyder
Orlando Hudson
Conor Jackson

We havent mentioned Eric Byrnes or Chad Tracy. All eleven of these guys have, for one reason or another, been supplanted as part of a significant restructuring, with the likes of Parra, Montero, Roberts, Allen, Garland and Buckner. Most of the bullpen turned over.

I'm not saying there wont be improvements from within this new, second tier of Dbacks. There assuredly will. I'm saying our true core of irreplaceable prime timers is consideraby smaller, and that Hall touting a broadly defined group is something of a contradiction in terms. Sixteen players is essentially 2/3 of a major league roster, and ours may fail to win 70 games this season. If we had an enviable core that large, in any imminent sense, we most likely wouldnt be looking up at the San Diego Padres.

In this business, you're either competing or rebuilding, and to the extent Hall's denied the latter, he's "competing" somewhere other than on the field, embellishing a decidedly underwhelming present and preliminary 2010 structure. How can any organization prioritize the final two months of a disasterous season as "tryouts" for next year, while denying some manner of a rebuild?

Public relations, that's how.

This Week's Hacks

noreply@blogger.com (Diamondhacks) — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 00:00:00 +0000

After Friday's intimate hypnosis, 30,000 rushed The Lovely Morgan turnstiles Saturday, in pursuit of Augie Ojeda bobbleheads that never arrived.

Then some 'irresponsible' kid named Mulvey, who 'didnt execute pitches' hurled the financially responsible Dbacks to their eighth loss in nine lies ( I cant bring myself to call them actual tries).

Speaking of tries, Chief Exaggerator/Obfuscator Derrick Hall rather audaciously took issue with a fan who labeled 2009 a "rebuilding year", on the apparent grounds plummeting out of contention and flipping one's roster represented sound club strategy all along. Diamondhacks pioneered making fun of our CE/O's cheesy indoctrinations, and the Valley's evidently followed suit. Get a load of Hall's latest post chat feedback. Ouch.

So there's fake vision and motives. Fake promotions. Fake major league baseball. Valley interest is so low that FSNAZ bumped Saturday's gamecast in favor of egregious and locally irrelevant Idaho - Washington football. Perhaps AJ Hinch's development exhibitions still warrant a boxscore in the morning paper.

Friday night, the wife and I endured a steambath HS rivalry clash that drew almost half what the Dbacks mustered downtown. Without air conditioning or the false promise of bobbleheads.

This morning we had a yard sale and realized less than half our normal gross. The economy? The heat? Waning interest in my hastily scattered, overpriced bric a brac? Nah. My wife noticed we had fewer Mexican families pile out of old cars, and we think that's the reason. They often buy a ton of kid's clothes and toys, and I guess many have returned to Mexico, for a variety of reasons. I feel a letter to my Congressman coming on.

Dear Honorable_________,

As a tax paying citizen and old white guy, I feel it incumbent on you to ensure that someone buy my old crap.

Regards