03 January 2009

Dbacks, Sage Ink 1 Yr $800K Dill

For the third thyme in five seasonings, the Arizona Diamondbacks reached a dill with resident sage, Tony Clark. The one year dill is reportedly for $800K, according to a highly sourced leek.

"I wont make a mint here" warned the irrepressibly chervil first baseman, "but I've put together some good Aprils and Mace, and god willing, can blend into the mix."

Manager Bob Melvin feels Clark will also exert enormous positive influence on his young roster:

You hear the sage stuff all the time with Tony, but we feel we may've latched onto a shaman, at the price of a sage. We're excited, almost to a frenzy, about Tony's presence.

The 6'8" Clark's preparation is legendary.

First thing I do when I cumin to the park is play pepper with the guys. Hitting requires methodical preparation. I take each of the kids through my various steps: Having the right attitude, Highlighting a pitch, and Hitting through the ball. I call it Preparation "H". The guys seem to take it in pretty well. It's a receptive group.

Song of the Day - Reunited (Peaches & Herb)


Jeff said...

What exactly are the guys taking in?

Preparation H.

At 60-some years old, this is no surprise.

Russell said...

This post is so bad I may have to call the bay leafs.

Peter Sellers said...


Vell, dont git caraway, Russell (if zat is your real name). Ze history instructs, ze Penzey's mightier dan ze swords!